Parental snobbery

I was always reluctant to tell my parents about my mental health diagnosis, probably because I had a pretty good idea of what my mother's attitude towards it would be and the words "helpful, supportive and understanding" weren't in the mix. Admittedly, she's been fairly good about my current relapse but the cracks have started to show today. I usually play the organ at a local church on Sunday mornings as it gives me a connection to music (I don't go for the religious experience as I can't understand why anyone would believe in a god). It also happens to be the church that my parents go to and my mother has always attempted to, at the very least, stick her nose in and, at the very worst, control me and what I play.

I did tell her that I would be going to respite (although I didn't call it that, I just said I was being given a week away and she seemed to be okay about it (yes, inside, I know it's nothing to do with her but our relationship is very complicated). She appeared to take great delight in having the authority to tell the priest that I was unwell but it now seems she had twisted it into a complicated lie as she has told me to be very careful what I say to him and to not say I'm going on holiday. I just didn't have the energy to get angry with her but inside I was close to erupting as there was no need to make up stories about what was going on with me.

I have now tried to straighten things my end by phoning the priest and telling him what has happened (without giving him all the gory details). This makes me feel much happier as I know the truth has been told. How my mother will take this, I don't know as I'm sure she was in the process of concocting an elaborate story of how I was very ill with a mysterious illness and she came running to my rescue. She even tried to push me into moving back with her but that's the last thing I need and will probably result in my being sectioned for trying to murder her. I've also told her that I don't want her phoning me every day to ask if I'm better. She doesn't seem to understand that my problems will not be cured overnight and asking me every day if I'm better will only make me worse. Perhaps she means well, but I don't think she's bright enough and lacks the empathy necessary to truly understand.

I don't think I'm asking much of her, I don't want money or physical things, I just want some space to recover and to be allowed to be an individual who can make her own decisions. Surely, that's not too much to ask?